In this chapter, the author reflects on the fundamental question: "What is it that I truly wanted?" Through a deep journey of introspection, they realize that all the happiness and joy they had once sought were based on false premises. When one stands upon the belief that the tangible, visible world is real and absolute, it becomes nearly impossible to recognize that one's desires have been misplaced. Without this realization, the true beginning of spiritual learning cannot even begin.
Many people, however, believe they have already started their journey. They may think they have progressed a great deal, only to one day be struck by the harsh truth that they had not even begun—and by then, it might be near the end of their physical lives. This moment of recognition, though painful, is valuable. If one still has time left in the physical world, then there remains an opportunity to face oneself, to reorient even slightly toward the true path—and this, the author argues, would make that life deeply meaningful.
Even the most glittering and successful life, if pursued without understanding the true nature of existence, will ultimately fade and become hollow. That is why it is vital to ask oneself sincerely: What is it that I really want? And: Have I truly grasped it?
For the author, the answer was the pursuit of truth—the desire to know what the "real thing" was, the unchanging essence that exists somewhere beyond this world. Through their spiritual journey, they encountered that truth, often referred to by different names—Taike Tomekichi, Albert, or the Mother Universe—but all pointing to one singular reality. This truth, they affirm, is the only genuine existence.
Though once consumed by profound loneliness and emptiness, the author now lives with certainty: the flow of consciousness exists, and they are a part of the true world of consciousness. With this understanding, they feel that they are, indeed, truly fortunate.
この章では、著者が人生を通して求めてきた「幸せ」や「喜び」がすべて誤った方向だったことに気づいた体験が語られます。形ある世界を本物だと信じていれば、自分の間違いに気づくことは困難であり、その限りにおいて、学びの本当のスタートラインにも立てません。しかし多くの人は、自分はすでに学びを進めていると思い込んでおり、実際には足踏みや後退をしている可能性があるのです。
それに気づかぬまま人生を終えることは、非常に空しく悲しいことですが、たとえ人生の終盤であっても気づきを得て心の針を本来の方向に向けられれば、それは大きな喜びとなります。
最後に著者は、自分が本当に欲していたものは「本当のこと」に出会うことだったと語り、それを学びの中で見出した今、自分は幸せ者だと確信しています。